The forth week of May, 23.05-28.05

 Monday 23.05 -  It was a holiday for me and I don't need to wake up early. I had nothing to do but to stay at home to do my homework and a little bit of learning. I went to Leverkuesen in the evening to meet up with Brian for a film. So, There was no connection between Köln and leverkuesen with the tram. I had to use the bus. It was a really good experience that I almost missed my bus stop 2 times. I didn't know that I am actually supposed to press the 'Stop' button in order for the bus driver to open the exit door. I thought that the bus will stop at every stops, unfortunatley not. The thing that I dislike is that the bus driver will not stop when you press the button even though the bus is close to come to a halt next to the bus stop. I find it really stupid and I had to make sure that I press the button as early as I could. I was lucky, the first time that a passenger helped me to inform te bus driver and the second time, the stop that I got out was just a few steps away from where I was supposed to get down.
Brian treated me for the evenings. He bought me the tickets and the food. It was extremely expensive to go for a movie. He paid for both of us. I ordered a small box of popcorn. It is interesting that they have salty and sweet popcorn available in the counter while in Malaysia there is only Carameled toppings popcorn. I didn't like the sweet popcorn. I was satisfied with the choices of popcorn available here. He thinks that it is interesting between the difference of the people in Hong kong and Germany about the type of popcorn they usually prefer. Most Germans prefer sweet and the Hongkongs prefer salty. Besides that, I got to know that he is going to America to study next year. He is actually quite nice, perhaps he was tired during Karneval and emotions are hard to control when one is tired. I spoked 3 languages with him while we were waiting for the film to start. He got an english accent in his cantonese because he went to a international school. He has a way of thinking about what he is going to study in America although it is not his choice. In his opinion, If there is a course available, professionals in need in that certain field. However in my opinion, it depends alot on the current needs in that certain time when we graduate. We might be lucky or otherwise. After the movie, both of us walked to the bus station. He is so concerned about my safety. He wanted me to tell him where I am at the moment until I reach home. He seems really matured in a way. Perhaps what most people say is true. Exchange programmes make the participants mature. I went home and waited for Kate to come back form choir. We had bread together and talked alot over what I think and what happened. It was a really good exercise for my progress in the language.

Tuesday,24.05- I had to wake up really early in the morning for my Arts course. We were working on the clay project. We had to make a plague with a head and a hand, to express a certain feeling. It was great but I didn't bring what I needed to keep the clay damp. It was certainly interesting. Then after school, I stay in school for Sports. It was definitely a long time, it was not that bad because I waited with Doro and Maya was there too. I didn't talk much but I listen more. After Maya and the others went for their sport lesson, Doro and I went to lay on the ping pong table for the sun. I slept eventually. The kids in are just so horrible. Doro had observed what the kids did when I was sleeping. The two girls used their scooter to hit the edge of the table for a hard metallic sound. I was obviously awaked by it. Doro had kind of scolded them. Yea, It was true like what Tommy told me. The younger generations here is awful. They are so naughty. In sports I had a great time doing Lontar Peluru and we played a little basketball. I had fun.

Wednesday, 25.05- It was really suprising to me on how the boy in Physics reacted. I went later to Physics and this boy sat on where I usually sit. Then so I decided to sit a row behind him. Then Rebecca was with me. She asked whether there are people sitting there. He answer yes and I asked where he sits normally in order for an exchange. He seem agitated and said that he has no place because I took his seat. Oh Jeez, for more than a month I have been sitting on his place and he didn't tell me. He was angry for me not knowing what is happening. He should have stuck his name on his seat. What nonsense. So ungentleman. I told Kate about it and she told me that most German do that. It is so unbelievable. She asked me whether I apologised. Of course I didn't. I don't even know what was happening and I have to apologise for him to not tell me that he sits there originally?  I sat next to Rebecca at the last row, I realised that I learn more when I sit next to her. That is just so ridiculous. However, I had a great time while I was waiting for orchestra. A girl from the A orchestra treated me a rice waffle. It has no taste but it was good. Flora is really nice, she talked to me while I was waiting and explained to me about things that I didn't know or understand. I felt that the boy Laureths is avoiding me because I will always talk when I walk with him to the tram station. However, It doesn't matter because I have others who are willing to talk to me.

Thursday, 26.05- I went to school as usual and after that. I had to buy the ticket for the Don Giovanni performance in the Köln Opera House. I went to the Opera house after school and bought the cheapest ticket. It is really cheap for student's tickets as there is a 50% rebate. I got my ticket just for 5.50 Euro. The best part is that I can take other better seats when there are empty. When I was back for sports, I actually forgot to tell Doro about it. She went to a boy's house because she thought that I went back home. We had basketball training in sports. I was so annoyed of the ball not being passed to me and so I went to block others. I was too in to the game and I have no idea of what the rules was. I just played and run. I got 4 fouls, unintentionally blocked 3 members and hurt 1 member. I got a good knock on my head. An exchange student from France came for sports. She is so quiet and she doesn't smile. I was expecting to talk to her but she speaks french. After sports I learned about the definition of Asocial from Doro, a word that I hear often while we were walking to the tram station together. She was on her way to her dad's apartment for a movie in the cinemas because she passed her driving theory test. I got some information regarding cinemas and driving tests from Doro. In the evening, Kate and I went to the Leverkuesen Folks school for a German film 'Finnischer Tango'. the cinema was small but good enough for a simple movie outing with friends. It was really interesting and heart warming, a blend of melancholy, love,friendship,life and comedy. The main character, Paul and two of his friends are musicians and they steal a Van from a Rock band. On the way, they played music while one of his friend drives. The driver have no will to live and drags both of them into a car accident. The driver dies but both of them survives. Paul knows that his other friend was alive but didn't bothered to help and took his accordion instead. The rock band was looking for him to pay for the loss of the expensive musical instruments. He runs away from them and tries to look for a job. He ended up playing for the handicaps with a fake identity as one of them. The story continues and he stays in a house with 2 contagons and a handicapped person. In a short time,he helped others and learnt to express his feelings. He changes and lived a better life.

Friday, 27.05- It was a full day for me in school. I really dislike waking up in the morning at 6am and I have to make sure that I be in school on time. I had Physics and I didn't sit next to Lisa. The boy didn't sit next to her but sat next to where Arsenji sat instead. I was with Rebecca at the last row. Maybe I should just wait and see. That boy is awful. During the break, Hendrik made appointments for our meeting next month. I am suprised that he is serious about it although he has no idea what to do exactly. During the weekends, Doro is going to visit her family in another region for a celebration and Rebecca is having a leadership camp. It is no fun when I visit Helena alone because I will feel awkward and I felt like staying at home during the weekends.   In the afternoon when I was going home with the Tram, it was so cramped up with people. We were literally packed like sardines in a can. Then comes two boys with their school bags. I was stading behind one of them and the other was facing me infront of the other. They were actually playing physically in such a cramped up bus. I told them to not play. I expressed to them that I wasn't happy about it. Of course the boy opposite of me realized it and told the one infront of me. He purposely pushed and leaned against me. He thinks that it is funny and it gave him pleasure. I had to be patience, I couldn't be yelling at them in that situation and my German is not that good. After they left, I thought of another way. Perhaps that children are just sensitive. I wasn't that nice when I asked them to stop playing. It would work if I use another approach in a positive way  instead of expressing how unhappy I was. It's the nature for most people to react to negative stimulus.
Norbert was sick and he couldn't join Kate for the Sapporo Philharmonie Orchestra performance in Dusseldorf Tonne Hall. We went there by the S-bahn and Kate was actually late to the train stationa as always. Maybe I should start playing my part in reminding her about the time. She was so stressed up again when she went to buy the tickets at the station before our train arrived. She did quite a number of mistakes. I was lucky because the tickets are definitely not cheap. They played quite well and it is just so me to be amazed by the 'wonders' of the performance hall. The violinist Akiko Suwana was the main highlight of the whole programme. She is skilled and lively. It was a pity that I didn't listen to some reference before I went to listen to the concert. Out of 4 pieces, I only knew 1 which is Elgar's nimrod and I think they did a good job in expressing that piece. Then when we are on the way home, she forgot to buy return tickets. Then she didn't trust me when I walk to the direction of the station. She was obviously stressed up again. I don't know how to help her. I was so tired and I failed to control part my mood. However, I realised that I improved alot and I should really work on it. Perhaps, I should really take an innitiative to remind her and not assume that she knows what to do.

Saturday, 28.05- I had nothing planned for outings with people today because I would really like to work on what I should do. Then I went out for a moment with Kate to the post office and the public transport service center. I was really annoyed when Kate told me what I should do and she had assumed how is Jo's character  when she had not even meet her personally. I feel that she is what Yvy said, a little pushy. She knows that and perhaps I should really accept the fact that it is her character. It is the same as my parents, I can't change them , instead of tolerating, I should accept the fact. Then there wouldn't be so much problem that I will create at home. Then I went to some garments shop and bought a pullover for 5 Euro. It is really cheap for a branded pullover and the quality is good. Then in the afternoon I ate tortellias, a Spanish food. I ate realatively a lot and I am seriously worried about my figure. I had to really lose alot of weight for my health too. I realise that fat layers are starting to accumulate behind my back and it is really horrible.
I tried to get Luis for 2 days but he wasn't picking up.So, I received his call during lunch. I got to know that there are 4 person going to Prag including me and Flor is purchasing the tickets not him. He told me that he is going to call Flor and tell her that. So, I was actually thinking of leaving the matter for Luis to work on it. However, Kate hinted me to call Flor myself instead since Luis takes things lightly. So, I called Flor before Luis called her. So, I learned that I should really not rely on others to do my job.

Sunday Kanu Trip 22.05.11

  The weather wasn't that promising, it was cloudy and windy. The Köln AFS commitee had planned the Kanu trip a month ago. Initially we planned to kanu by the Sieg river, however the weather was too dry and the water level of the river was too shallow. We went over to Wupperhof instead.  I almost catched a cold when I was having breakfast with Kate in the Winter garden.

 I wasn't well prepared for the weather nor the trip. Kate was really concerned and she thinks ahead. I packed a set of garments, just in case I fall in to the river. She brought a rain coat for me and a hat. I wasn't really concerned about it because I am already ready to get wet. Sounds ridiculous because I was lazy to use my brain. So then, I packed a bottle of Sprudel water. It is not usual for me to drink that water, but I realize that I am slowly getting use to it. It is not a bad idea after sports, it's slightly salty.

Okay, I went to the Deutz tram station early in the morning and it was drizzling. I felt really cold. Volker and his wife Annette picked me up at the entrance of the station. There was also another girl with me, as far as I remember, she is slightly older than me. The Gemans are really good in socializing and generation gap is not so far apart. She was talking and talking and I had generally no idea what to say. The Germans are really sarcastic in a way and they think it is funny, especially the guys. On the way to our destination, Volker wanted me to explain what I did for the past few days. I was sleepy so I didn't talk much. Then Annette and the other continued their conversation.

When we reached, the others are already there. katalina came with Hanna. Kata dyed her hair. I am really convinced that the latinos really spend their money, especially to groom themselves. Brian came later then, with his family member. They are really sweet people. I still had the bad impression from the first outing we had. However, I had to try anyways to prove that I am wrong. I was so hungry and I ate a frikadella made by Volker. It was so juicy and delicious. I am definitely going to have the recipe one day. I was really suprised that the Germans are so used to have sweets everywhere they go. Every Kanu has a tub where we put our important things in it so that it is secured from the water and under our surveilliance. There will be sweets like mars, Balisto, Knopper, crackers, chocolates, snickers and buenos in the tubs of the younger generations. I was in the same Kanu as Hanna and Kata. I know that Hanna is vegetarian but the way she consumes sugar is terrifying to me. Obviously, Katalina is also the same just not as bad. The Latinos speaks spanish among each other again, even the Germans that knows how to speak the language. I am not so annoyed this time because I know that they just can't help it. Oh well, not my lost. I can still speak with others. 

  We had a four hour routine of Kanuing along the river. We received rain at least three times while we are on the river. The first time was the worst because most of us got so wet. I was lucky to have my new rain coat and a plastic bag from Annette to cover my lower body. I was the only one that was still relatively dry. I was feeling really cold though. It was funny that none of us fell into the river besides Volker, Ushi and her husband's Kanu. They were too heavy. When the stream was strong enough and they sank deeper into the water, the stream was capable enough to turn the Kanu over. It was really fun. In the mids of the trip, I was so hungry that I had to feed on the poison(sweets). We had really a good time anyways. While we rowed and met Brian's Kanu, We would combine our Kanus and move on together. The amusing part is, I am pretty sure that I am staying 90% dry but I got wet because of that. The small gap between the two boats allows water to splash upwards when the waves are slightly stronger. I was so annoyed with te water but I had an awesome time spent.

During a part of the journey, It was such a funny scene to see that Katalina had no further interest in rowing. She ate a lot of sweets but the way she rows the kanu makes me laugh. She was just merely stirring the surface of the water. Hanna and I was rowing the normal way. I don't think they realized the cause of my laughter. Along the way we saw herds of ducks and cows. We even went through brigdes with people observing what we were doing, rowed across bike riders favourites-forest trails. The cows reminded me of the poem that the english teacher handed out to us. The cows have really nothing to do but to see what is happening around them and to chew their food. They live a really simple life. 

When we arrived at our final destination, we had a picnic somewhere on the grass. It was really a nice weather for a picnic, windy but not cold. Then we had lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, cheese, Frikadelle and bread. Max brought Konyakku with him to share out. I am really suprised that most of them have never tasted it before. I felt really proud and lucky to be a Malaysian. I have the opportunity to taste almost everything and most of them taste exactly the same as overseas. Besides that, most of the Malaysian are able to afford to taste international cuisine.  I had a big problem in defining the language I know. Especially when they ask me about the difference between madarin, Cantonese and Hakka. They are really suprised that I can speak in these languages. In total I know 4 languages and 2 chinese dialects. The funny part is when I gave Brian Lam my handy number. I was so used to count in Mandarin and he heard it. I shocked him when I spoke Mandarin and Cantonese. I assumed that he knows, It was really an enjoyment to see his reaction. 

 I was talking about Shinji about the difficulties I am facing to find a date to the cinemas because he is always drunk during the weekends. So, I gave an idea to Brian to go to the cinemas together on Monday to watch Fast and Furiuos 5. It is not the kind of movie that I will watch but It was better than nothing. he is going to leave soon and I hope I am able spend more time with him. 

In the evenings, Kate, Claudia, Yvy and I went to the Kölner Philharmonie for a Diven performance on Modern arts and music. It was really interesting that the house was almost full. I was so amazed and excited when I was in the building itself. The hall was so huge and grand. During the intermission, we went out to chat with others and come to realise that the performance is for the contagons. Not a bad experience as a birthday present. The starting was a tenor's performance. I find the ending of the extracts from pieces are really grand although I expected it to be in another manner. It reminded me how Michael explained that it is very German to end with a grand ending. Oh well, It's interesting to me. Then comes a lady, Georgette Dee that sounded like a mans voice. She expressed and sang the songs in a really weird way and I was astounded. She got the crowd's applause. I suspected that she is a homosexual. Anyways, there was another man Tim Fischer, I think he did a great job in expressing the poems, just that I can't understand most of the contents. The was also a blues band, then comes the interesting duo of Rebecca Carrington and Colin Brown. It was really interesting and Rebecca had exposed the audience on how much she could do with her Cello Joe. With her cello, she made it sound like a bagpipe, played indian music and chinese music. She played and sang pop songs by madonna and another singer with her cello with Bach. Nevertheless, she did Opera and beat boxing. She mimicked the sound of the trumpet just with her voice, it was totally cool. There was also an english band that did a good job on making the crowd high. They sung evergreens and famous songs. It was really funny when they invited 2 of their stage dancers up to dance. According to Yvy and Claudia, they did a really bad job in dancing.

After several outings with Kate, I realised that she is easily stressed with small things. I think it is uneccessary when it doesn't help much and makes things worse. For example, I was already ready to board the Train to Köln but she wasn't. She was later than what she had told me. Then she forgot to bring some items. It reflected to me that I am quite similar to her when it comes to important things that are on the edge of the deadline. I should train myself to stay clam at all circumstances because things won't work out if I rush or being over stressed. I should also be prepared and plan ahead at all times.

3rd week of May 16.05.11-21.05.11

On Monday, I spent the hours before school just to look over other scholarship infos for the JPA PIDN scholarship. I would really like to appeal for another course in another university. I was so stressed up over the scholarship and I the ministry of education gave only one week to decide. I was so tensed up that if I don't deal with the online offer acception process, I couldn't get anything. I know that I am determined to stay in germany until January but perhaps I could appeal for later registration. It was drizzling for almost a whole day here. Today in Maths class, a girl from the 12th grade joined our class. She had to repeat the year again due to some reasons. It is really weird that she has no idea what the others are doing. Perhaps she wasn't in school. I walked to the tram station with Liam. He is such a nice person but a little childish. I heard that the German guys are not gentlemen. Of course not all but Liam is such a good example. It was raining and I had my umbrella. I opened it up and held it for a long duration of time. I was waiting for him to offer a hand while I am much shorter and 'smaller' than he is. I had to ask him to hold it. On our way, he told me that his sister is now in New Zealand working in a Travel and work programm. It sounds really interesting, I wonder if Malaysia has this programme too. I had a really warm dinner today. It was definitely a pleasure when the weather is so chilly.

On Tuesday, I was so blur that I missed the group that travelled to the Köln Opera House with the Tram. I forgot that Rebecca was going there by her bicycle. Obviously I wanted to spend more time during the break with Helena, Doro and Maya. However, I was lucky enough to have Rebecca giving me guidance and help. She brought me to the Opera house. The workshop in the Opera house is interesting that we were taught to express ourselves in different methods, body languages and basically about Don Giovanni. It is also really cool to learn about the huge difference in the way different gender's gesture. For example, the girls need really little space to feel comfortable, so they feel natural to cross their legs or place their feet together most of the time; the guys needs space, thats why they feel natural to place their legs and hands wides open. The workshop teacher taught is the different culture of comfortable social distance and ways of counting numbers (with hands) from people of differnt countries. The workshop ended 15 minutes late and I had to rush home to have my lunch and my sports garments picked up. I was able to make it for sports. I played Lontar Peluru and football. We did interesting sprints as warm ups. I felt much better when I was told to not worry about the scholarship in Malaysia. It is not that prestigious to the extent of stressing myself up.

Wednesday, I really dislike the art teacher. She is so weird and the students don't respect her.She is always manipulated by the students. I feel that she has no idea what she really wanted to do. I worked on my sketch for the sculpture of a head and hand with clay for the next project. I had no idea what to do, so I just sketched out something easy.  The best was physics. I repeated the electromagnetic and electrostatic topic again. However their syllabus is much more in detail. In the end of the class, Arsenji told me to have a wonderful Frikadellchen. I had no idea what that was and the others told me to not listen to him as he is a little crazy most of the time. I thought that he was just joking but he showed me what a frikadellchen is after school. We waited in the kiosk just for me to see what it is. Casper was there too, it was actually ridiculous because is was better if he would let me try some of it. It was a good laugh. After that I had choir practice and Orchestra. Everything turned out to be better than before. I am closer witht he other members and also Laureths. I feel more at ease. Then I boarded the tram directly to the OLG where the Kölner Kurrende is performing on Friday. I went to listen to their final practice before the performance. I wasn't in a good mood. The hall was huge and classy but the acoustic wasn't really ideal in my opinion. However it was really good and I did my German work. After that, when we were waiting for the tram together with some of the other members, we talked. I realised that an Bass was really sarcastic when he was talking to me. I was feeling really weird and I had to smile like a naive girl at his sarcasm. I was not in a good mood, perhaps that might influence my interpretation.

Thursday, okay. music, liam sat next to me. insensitive. rebecca. not together. more to herself,bought the opera tickets and didn't inform . I got my paper, biology. wished hendrik. nice. wanted to talk to him but i feel like a chicken. didn#t work out. i got nothing to do no sports. stayed at home for the scholarship crazy

Friday was the best day ever. I literarily invited myself  to the grill party Doro organized. I actually planned to help out in the Kölner Kurrende performance but I chose to join them. I managed to listen to them practice though, it was better than nothing. I went to Wiener Platz to buy some things in the Rossmann drogery markt. I was comparing and converting prices. Somebody told me to not convert, but if I don't do it, I will be spending a fortune. Then I went to Frisenplatz and met a couple of new people like Leonie and Doro's best friend she met in Argentina.  They grilled and the weather was nice . It was more like a grill-picnic. I was suffocating with the cigarette smoke they puffed out. Could you just imagine, 10 out of 15 smokes. I had a great time anyway, Doro offered me to stay over at her dad's crane house. I rejected her offer because I was not used to the culture. I ate Helena's 'küz küz', it was good but not as tasty as the first time I tasted it in sarah's house during her birthday party. Doro made Taztziki with yoghurt, cucumber, pepper, salt and spring onion. It was really light and tasty with baguette.

On Saturday, I met up with Doro and Helena in the morning at Neumarkt. They were planning to buy something for a girl that was turning eighteen on that day. They eventually went to H&M. That brand is really popular as the quality is good and price is reasonable. Finally, they went to DM markt to buy small items as a care pack. It was really cool. What they got in the care pack was shampoo, sun cream, sweets and others. I tasted a 'healthy' sweet that is made out of grape sugar. Taste like sprite and a little bit of  the mentol effect. I ate spaghetti with risotto sauce made by both of them at Helena's house. She has a 2 years old cat too, by the name of Luci. :)

Culture Sunday.Kultur Sonntag 15.05.11

  It was really chilly when I woke up this morning. It was drizzling outside and the weather was dreary. Today is Culture Sunday and most of the museums entrance were free. Pita had confirmed that she and her friend Franz would join us together. The weather was suppose to be nice but it rained and rained. Claudia was not able to go to the musuem with Kate because she fell out of the bike. She wasn't feeling well. Kate is such a nice mother, she packed most of the goods and Claudia's favourites as a care pack.

  Later then, Kate drove me to the Huemarkt and I had to walk to the chocolate musuem. I was lucky that the rain wasn't really heavy when I was on my way and I prepared an umbrella with me. I saw a handfull of people standing next to the entrance of the musuem. They had no umbrellas. Poor thing. The Germans are so punctual that they don't even bother to let the visitors in although it was raining heavier. It came to an extend that it hailed. It was really dumb. A German guy himself had pulled out a sarcasm over the punctuality his kind while he was striked by particles of ice. The wind was really strong too. Finally, they allowed us to enter when it was exactly 10am. It was ridiculous. 

  It was a really nice tour in the chocolate museum and we tasted the waffles dipped in warm chocolate from the fountain. It was really tasty. We wanted to buy some chocolates but it was too expensive. I realise a really interesting culture in Germany. They sell items that are soon expiring with a really cheap price. Even the chocolates. I could afford to purchase but I just can't afford to finish that whole chunk of sweet poison. Then We saw the chocolate dispensing machine from the earlier days. Chocolates were used earlier as a medicine for cold, cough and deworming. The spices like peppers, cinnamon and cloves are used widely in chocolate production. Chocolate was once as expensive as silver and pirates were actually hired to steal the kakao beans. 

 After that we went to visit the Ludwig museum. I finally visited the museum that owns a relatively large amount of Pablo picasso's work donated by Peter and Irene Ludwig. There are not only his works but others too. It is hard for us to understand what exactly the artist are expressing through their art work. Especially modern art and Pop art. I saw a really funny art work with the title, 'Burning Pain'. It was small piece of lightly toasted bread. There was a few rounds of metal wire around the bread against a block so that the bread was upright. a small part of the bread was burnt. In front of the area burnt stood a fire lighter. It made me laugh because it was something that I didn't expected. It was simple but nice and well expressed. The sculptures were really interesting too. Near the entrance of the exhibition stood a huge sculpture of a fat lady supporting her weight by tipping her toes with her left foot. I find it funny.

It was a pity that Pranz had to leave after we visited the Ludwig museum. Pita and I then went to the romanische-germanische musuem where they place artifacts dug out from the area in Cologne.  There were really cool items from the romans and parts of the romans building. The most intersting and beautiful items were the mosaic floor and the carvings on the stones or graves. The romans were really artistic. We couldn't learn much from this museum because there was too much information for us to know.

Pita was really hungry after our visit to the chocolate museum. She was looking for a Backery. However, we ate after 2 hours. She and I bought a Laugenbrezel from the famous franchiase Bakery - Kamps. I realised that I really enjoy eating the salted pretzel here. It tastes so delicious. We went through the Hohe strasse to Neumarkt and went home.The weather was nice then.

When I arrived home, the weather was not getting any better. It rained and I felt really cold. Kate and I wanted to go for concerts as planned but it didn't work out because I was late and she forgot about it. It was still a nice day when I was able to have really warm dinner in such a chilly weather. I watched a tatort that Kate and I didn't understand the story. Maybe I need to keep watching the series to understand it. :)

2nd week of May (monday)09.05.11 - (sat)14.05.11

Okay, so I started to feel bored in school. Nothing was my priority and I actually almost anything I want.

Mondays are actually the best and also the worst. The best part is I only have 2 periods of Math in school and I get to go for language school; the worst part is I don't really get to mix around with the other students.

On tuesday, I get to watch the film with my classmate in German course. We are watching ''The Perfume''. It's a french based film about a gifted guy with his smell sense. He could smell really well, the best nose in France. However, he wanted to capture and sustain the specially attractive scent from females. He killed girls that owns really good scent and found a way to capture the scent. So, at last he died in a disgusting way. It's quite a slow paced film but full with suspense. It was tiring for me because I didn't read the book. It was some how interesting. I had English and I didn't write my poem because I was lazy and I had no idea.  The teacher makes mistakes every lessons I have attended. I don't really mind pointing it out but that would be embarassing for her and also bad for me in some ways, I am really lucky that she is a nice teacher. I couldn't meet up with my contact person because I made a mistake on the time my sport course starts. However, I was also an hour late for my sport course because a handful of the students got the time confused including Doro. So, I was also late. Then I went to stroll around severin strasse to see what stores are in that area. Anyways, if I knew it earlier, I could have met up with my contact person. It was just a pity.

 On Wednesday, I met up with a freanch horn player from the B orchestra along the way to school. I talked a lot with him in German. He seems a really nice boy, for his age. I was not required to stay in school for the whole day because I have 3 hours spare. I started to think whether I should stop the choir in school because I felt really boring. The people in choir are so quiet. However, they started to speak with me and smiled more than usual. After that, I stayed for orchestra. I got my B-flat Trumpet with a monthly rental fees of 10 Euro per month. I was thinking of not joining the orchestra because I was not having any fun. Again, things worked out. Two of the young trumpet members helped me in my German hand-outs and they started to talk more to me. They are really nice. Laureths, the 16 years old trumpet players that looks miserable most of the time, talked to me too. Although he seems reluctant to reply a Hi to me, I think he is just shy. The orchestra performance that was planned to be held next Wednesday was cancelled. So, logically speaking, they are really young children and they are hard to control. The duration for performance preparation is insufficient too. It's a pity that those who really worked for it couldn't perform, on the other hand, it is a good decision for the orchestra to have more time to sort matters out. After that, I was really sure that I saw Laureths behind me when I leave the school. I was suprised that he arrived early than me. I was really curious so I asked him to show me the way next time when I see him. He smiled. Great, this boy actually smiles. I hesitated to say Bye to him when he left the tram because of his face expression, I didn't say it and he turned around. Okay, that was a bad sign. I should say it next time.

  I got luck on Thursady morning, I saw Laureths while I was half awake in the tram. (I snoozed all the way from the beginning to the end) I catched up with him after boarding out of the tram. He was a little suprised. I got luck! He showed me the fast and direct way to school. I talked really much to him. He is really a nice boy. He was in Barcelona for 6 months and he enjoyed it very much. Spain is obviously so different from Germany. The people in Spain are really friendly and the weather was warm all the time. It was suprising that he couldn't speak Spanish while the others I know managed to master the language in that given period of time. So, I learned that how effective a person learns depends on his/her capability. There are no standardized answer to one's progress of learning because in every rules or theories, there are meant to be exceptions. During our conversation, he asked about my class. When I told him that I was in the 11th grade he didn't belived. Especially when I told him about my age. Oh well, it happens all the time. I don't think it happens only to me but also other asians. I had a great time speaking with him. I played basketball for sports. Oh Lord, I had a little fear for the game although it was much better compared to volleyball. I can't run with the ball. What I was able to do was to pass and block others. Any how, having some skills is better than having none. I went for a monthly meeting in the evening with the AFS exchange students and volunteers. It was so boring due to the absence of most members. I felt really upset when they spoke in Spanish. I felt that the people in school are so much better than them. I was actually allienized fro 30 minutes. I understand that they love their country or exchange country, but they should really show some respect and be considerate to others. Now I know how carima felt when I allienised her in school by talking in my mother language among friends without translating to her.

On Friday, I got only four periods in school due to the Parents day. I went home early and spent most of the time at home. I went to the gardening outlets and discounter market with Kate. It was a nice trip. At night I was asked about the JPA scholarship by Joe Yin. She was a little dissapointed when she knew that she didn't get the scholarship offer.  She finally had a plan for our trip during summer. I thought that I was going to make my decisions all the time. I am sure that she don't know what she would like to see in Hamburg or Berlin. I had to do most of the research. I received a mail too from AFS regarding the midstay trip. I was allowed to choose 3 options of camps and of course I have to pay. It was really expensive and I had to think about it. Through the Friday news magazine I discovered that it is Culture Sunday in Cologne. I would really like tovisit museums because most entrance fees of the museums in Cologne are free of charge. So, Kate looked up the magazine. She actually planned for me and not being considerate on my friends. However I find it good that she helped out because I had other things in head in that moment.

On Saturday, I checked the JPA results. I was granted an offer from the government. I was so happy and I leaped in joy. I went down immediately to tell Kate. Okay, so I told her. I felt so stress up when she told me what I should do. Obviously I know what I should do. Sometimes I felt that her suggestions are indirectly harsh on my parents. Maybe I gave her a false impression or she understood it wrongly about my parents. On the way back home to the market, Kate suggested that I should tell my parents to pay for the expensive sailing camp because I got the JPA scholarship. I don't really like to do that to my parents although my parents used that method on me for my UPSR in exchange for money. I feel that I in a way blackmailing my parents if I do that. In my opinion, I should just ask directly without any conditions. I told her directly that I don't like to do it. She started to tell me how her girls disliked it too and she was a little sarcastic on me. She told me how a mother will I be in the future. Well, I didn't like that method because I saw the results from children of other families and also my own. I just simply answered her that I don't know what kind of mother I would be. It might be effective to educated a child if I use it as little as possible, but I already knew what I want. I didn't attend scholarship interviews for other things, it for my future. Sometimes I just do whatever I would like to and I don't really need to explain as long I know what I am doing. The issue was left aside because I was upset. I am really sure that I will talk nonsense or crap if I continue. She is a really nice lady and I respect her for educating such good children.
Afetr talking to my parents and reading through the contents of the offer letter, I was turned down by the fact that the scholarship was for PIDN and not what I have apllied for. I didn't get the type of scholarship I applied for but I got the subject I am interested in. I couldn't make a decision on whether to take up the offer. while the university is in Kedah and the allowance was not as much as expected. I was totally stressed up.

8.05.11

Darn it, tomorrow is mother's day and I have no Idea what to do for my host mom. I guess I'll do her garden. She is the first person I saw to be so concern about her garden. Her choir girl friend Bruni was also talking about her moss in her garden. My mom in Malaysia too, usually I cook her breakfast.

My mom brought me out to a discount store LIDL and ALDI for groceries shopping. Since the day I arrived Germany, I wondered whether there are markets here like in Malaysia that sells cheaper goods than the supermarket. After that, she brought me to the market where Marlene (returnee from Indonesia) worked. The prices of goods are more expensive than the goods sold in the supermarket and discount store. Now I know the reason why I don't have much chances to visit markets. I felt a suprised when I saw the bean sprouts sold in the market. I thought it was impossible to buy things like that here in Germany. When I would like to make soup or dishes, I know where to get them.

I went for a 'shopping concert' in WDR today. It was free admission and they perform the concert once a month. I went there alone because I couldn't find anyone to go with me. I found out why it's free too. It's only 30 minutes of performance. I actually missed the most of it because I was late. There was a demonstration against the right extremist in the Main Train Station in Cologne. The trams were interrupted.

Expect the unexpected

 Mondays and Thursdays are my favorite days of every week. I don't have to wake up early in order to reach school slightly before 0750. It would really be good for me to be like a snail in the morning. I have never done that in Malaysia. I am always awake once I am awake then. I even slept in a public transport vehicle. Honestly speaking, I was feeling really tired.

I never expected much from the students here in school. I assume that the students here will not bother my existence in school sooner or later. Fortunately, it is really true that the less you expect the less disappointments a person receives. In another way of saying, when you expect less the more surprises you receive. It's just like on Monday, I met a classmate, Lyam from Maths and Music course at the train station after school. I expected nothing from him or assumed that he might pretend to not see me. Eventually he said Hi to me and asked me whether if everything's okay. However he expressed that particular sentence in a way that I have never heard before. He can't explain it himself. I thought that he was talking baby language to me. I told my mother and sister about that. They started laughing because his way of expressing is really cute. They suggested that I should reply him in a cute way too. My face flushed pink because that way of replying his question might cause misunderstanding. They suggested reply was ''Everything's okay, my teddy" It's not really rhyming or that funny when I translated it into English. None the less, He was the first German boy who I think is really open. Or maybe it is because he was also an exchange student?

The students here take a long time to warm up, it takes a longer time than expected for them to talk to me. I was glad that I took the initiative first, it was so much better than waiting. A girl, Hana in orchestra that plays the flute started to chat with me on Wednesday. She was really nice too. After speaking with her, I can really conclude that German is a complicated and hard language. She even told me that the Germans make mistakes too when speaking. Most of them can't really explain the grammar clearly. Kate told me that German is in their blood. Telling myself that German is hard is not much of a use, I still have to learn it in order to make more friends and understand Germany more.

The better I handle the language, I felt easier to communicate and make friends with the Germans. Most of the students feel easier to speak with me now. Honestly, I start to think that they don't really speak to me because of the level of their English, besides being shy. When I got to know them more, I learned that they really friendly and are always happy to help. I am glad that I am enrolled in this school. Just like in my Biology class, the teacher wanted the students to explain the class to me in English because the scientific terms they use in German takes time for me to look up in the dictionary. The Biology teacher helped me a lot in understanding the class and participating with the others. I wasn't left out. The motto of the school,"school without racism, school with courage" is already a sign of warm welcome to the foreign students or students or different races. I am really lucky because my school is really active in semester exchange programs. I find that the students that returned from foreign countries are friendlier and more open minded.

Tutankhamun's Grave Exhibition, 01.05.2011

 I weighed myself again in the bathroom after having a shower. I increase 2 kgs again. That is just crazy, I have been breaking and creating new records for the past 2 months. I feel disgusted of myself. At that moment, I had to tell Kate about it. I told her that it like some nerves I have to snack. She realised it too and I accepted the offer from her to help me. Obviously I will feel much more better when I am not so heavy.

 To finish up the food, we actually wanted to invite the other exchange students in the region. However, most of them are still in holidays and the invitation was too 'out of a sudden'. I managed to get Katalina to visit and have lunch with us. While Kate and I were talking about my plans for the afternoon with Kata, Hilde called up. She told Kate that she had extra tickets for the Tutankhamun exhibition in Koeln. Hilde planned to visit the exhibition with her brothers and sons on that day as a birthday trip together.

Both of us, Kate and I waited outside the street for Hilde. Kate explained to me that Stephan, a son of Hilde is really smart but is undergoing depression and having diabetes. I realized that he speaks really little and smiles a lot. I had fear once, on the first day we met during Carnival parade in Duunwald. He picked up candies for me and smiled all the time. He talked really little and sometimes doesn't reply when questioned. I just feel that sometimes it really a pity for people that are born geniuses but God took some things away from them like a trade, they didn't have a chance to choose.

Back to the main topic, I learned a little about the general history of Egypt in school, it was so boring. I was really surprised to learn that one of the famous Egyptian Pharaoh Akhenaten had 8 daughters with Nefertiti. After his death, his son Tutankhamun ruled Egypt during the New Kingdom in the 18th dynasty when he was in the age of 9 or 10. He was then married to his half sister, Akhensenamun. There are some really interesting facts about the changes in the religion between the father and son. You can look it up in Wikipedia while the Pharaohs had changed their names because of their religion. Initially, the name Tutankhamun was not known until an artist,archaeologist, Egyptologist Howard Carter had found his Tomb. He was funded by Lord Carnavon for the excavation in the King of Valleys. The search had been interrupted by the World War I, after that Carnavon was undergoing an economical crisis. He was dissatisfied with lack of results, he gave Carter one more season of funding. His last hopes lie upon the final excavation site that was already excavated before. He was slightly discouraged but he was still determined to find the Tomb. Until one of the workers had found the tomb, he was so satisfied and happy that he momentarily forgot about the hardships that he had went true. It was his childhood dream and it was finally accomplished. However a while after the tomb was discovered, a python swallowed his canary .  It was a belief to the locals that it a sign of a curse because Carter had disturbed the grave of the King. Some of the workers had fear.

It was such a pity that Carter had to go through the hardships of getting people to help him. His discovery contributed a lot to the world. I learned a lot in that exhibition had was touched by his determination and none the less he never gave up. He still believed and held hope even though it was really a tough journey for him.

I was glad that I had an opportunity to visit the exhibition while Kate told me that it was so famous in her times that people actually flew to New york and waited for a long queue for the tickets. I learned a lot but I just summarize what I knew,and if I did, my post will be extremely long.

My belated birthday party

I know that most of you know that I have just celebrated my Birthday a month ago. I celebrated my birthday with my family. It was so hard for me to find a day to have a birthday party while I had to go for the JPA PILN interview in Frankfurt on Friday on my birthday week itself. I actually decided to separate my birthday party in to two. One is only for people from Germany and another only for exchange students.

I had my birthday party on 30th of April. My whole morning was filled with preparations for my party. I bought too much food for the party. Kate had a party to attend so she had to leave the house early. I had the kitchen all to myself for 2 hours and Yvonne came by to help out. I planned to make the Chinese dish steamed water egg, "jing shui dan". Eventually they don't have a steamer or a Wok for me to steam. Everything here was so different and I had to figure out what items or ingredients to substitute with. I used rum instead of the chinese beer or something, the scents of rum was similar. I used a big pot as my steamer, there were no suitable utensils for me to put the pyrex dish into the pot. The steam from the water was really hot. Yvy thought of some basic way. She tied strings around the dish and slowly inserted in into the pot. It was a good and funny idea. However, it was not an ideal steamer. It added extra water to my egg as the lid of the pot was flat instead of being curved. I wasn't sure about the ration of the amount of water that I should use to the the amount of egg I had. It turned out really soft and fluffy. Besides the texture, I didn't add enough salt and soya sauce, the taste was really mild. It was really entertaining for me to see the expression of my guest eating my 'failed' product. However it tasted good for me after adding enough soy sauce. They weren't used to it, they ate a little (WITHOUT ADDING SOY SAUCE) and they didn't want more. They told me it was tasty but lack of taste. Of course I know what was the truth.

I invited more than 10 guest through facebook, most of them would really like to come but they were on holidays. Only 4 guests turned out yesterday, it was Doro, Maya, Rebecca and Leonie. I am not really close with Leonie to the extend that I actually can't recall her name. I can't even remember how I met her. However, everything turned out better than I expected. The girls were really nice people.  :) I was lucky that I had a good time with them. I got a board game from Maya and Doro, it's called activity. It's my first German board game. It's like pictionary. They played a few good rounds and I find that it was a really good gift that I have received. My neighbour Peter gave me a sling bag with the map of Koeln on it. It was unpredictable and 'useful'. I liked it alot.

My mom Kate had a Croquet set, it was a cute game. Rebecca, Leonie and I played it while we were waiting for Maya and Doro. The Cat Mila was all over the hooks, especially when I needed to hit the ball through a particular hook. She lied in front of the hook and scratched her cheeks on the hooks. She even rolled in front of the hook showing her white furry belly. Obviously, she wanted attention and people to rub her.

Rock Climbing, 25.04.2011

On Monday the 25th of April, My sister's father Peter offered me to come along with Jamie for rock climbing. I had a little fear that things would turn out awkward because I assumed that it would be only Jamie, him and I together. However, it was unexpected that my sister Yvonne came along. Katarina, Yvy's dad's girlfriend came too. She is a nice lady.

Peter paid for us into the Climbing Hall and treated us ice-cream. I didn't feel so good after eating the magnum-similar ice-cream. I guess it was just too much for my digestion.I could feel excitement flowing through my veins when the I stood in the hall. I didn't know that climbing requires two person. One remains on the floor making sure that the other climbs safely. The one on the floor has to control the rope tied on to the climber. I thought of how easy that accidents can happen if one of them isn't concentrating.

I was really fast at my first attempt because of my enthusiasm. I was surprised that they advised me to climb slowly. I thought about it was perhaps because I would hurt my muscles. Anyhow, it was rather better to start slowly because I felt tired already after the first attempt. My arm muscles were really sore as I overused it. To climb effectively,one must use both the arms and legs. For a start, I stuck my body so close to the wall until I can't even see which are the suitable rocks that I can support to. It was just funny and stupid. Eventually I tried to use my legs, it was a lot easier to climb as all the energy needed is not stressed on both my arms. The experience was just awesome because I felt a sense of satisfaction when I was able to go higher than before after several attempts. You really need to try from different approaches to get a firm grip on the rocks. There was also something interesting I tried. It was a tight band of rope that Was tied on two poles. A person has to stand on it and walk along the rope from one end to another. I almost fell out of the band when Jamie tickled me. :)

On the way home, it made me reflect on how we should solve problems in life. If the first method didn't work out, perhaps we should try the second. If the following attempts didn't work out, we have to keep trying and never give up. Of course, we don't just keep trying through the same approaches but form a different perspective. There is ought to be failures, but to succeed it is always worth it. It doesn't mean that I have to keep going and going without a halt. Sometimes, giving yourself a short pause in the process of solving a problem or chasing your dreams doesn't mean that it will ruin everything. We just simply need to rest to move on.